Settling In…To Frustration?!
This is a difficult stage of culture shock, familiar to anyone who has lived abroad or traveled for a long time. You don’t understand gestures. You get laughed at, you horribly offend a little old lady without knowing why.
The usual response is anger. I often tell people that culture shock is is walking out the door, being greeted by a neighbor and wanting nothing more than to shout obscenities at them.I legitimately hate this city. Granted, I haven't had a great deal of time to enjoy it, and that is probably why I hate it. A man was meowing at a girl on the metro today. Seriously?!?!
It is a visceral reaction that permeates every part of the experience, from misunderstanding shopkeepers, to losing your keys or missing the bus. Frustration comes and goes, disillusion comes on like a monsoon and the pangs of homesickness can become debilitating.
Today we had a meeting that took ALL day and was miserable. I hardly undestood a word they said and the room was so stuffy, toward the end I just got so stressed I nearly had a panic attack and myself and Becca RAN out of the building as soon as people started leaving. Stupid French Bureaucracy.
I am currently bouncing between depression, acceptance, and frustration...stimm waiting for this honeymoon stage.
In positive news, I have managed to learn how to take the metro around the city and I am working on the bus. This is officially the longest time I've been away from home without a family member and I think it's just barely starting to hit me that I have moved out of my hometown and I am in Europe.
I am praying to whatever God that will listen that I will find a suitable housing arrangement before Monday. I NEED to be settled so this can feel like some sort of home.
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